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 I Don’t Want To Pray  

Lord,  

If prayer is meant to be marked by honesty, then I need to acknowledge that most of the time lately, I would rather read about you than talk with you.   But you already known that, don’t you. I find it easier to read the Bible than talk to the author. In fact, I think that I use my reading time to avoid praying. Why is that? Is it a commentary on the intimacy that is meant to exist between us?  

Bev tells me I am often like that with her, too. We can be driving in the car or out walking and she will say, “Haven’t you got anything to talk about with me?”  I wonder now, Lord, if you would ask me the same question; “Mike, don’t you want to talk with me about anything that is happening in your life?”  

I know that prayer doesn’t always involve words. But I also know that it needs to involve words some of the time, surely. Your word teaches me that the Holy Spirit prays through us with groanings and sighs too deep to be uttered, too deep to be put into words.   But, Lord, I need your Spirit to inspire me with a desire to communicate with you using words. How can I know that you have answered my prayers if I do not articulate those prayers?  

I want to share all of my life with you just as I want to share all my life with Bev. Please alert me to any factors in my life that are hindering the free flow of my heart into your heart and for that to carry over into my relationship with Bev.  

Amen.

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