PrintMy last two log entries have seen me confronting my need for a fresh revelation of God in my life. I concluded the last entry with these words,
So, where does that leave me in this "love relationship" with God? Maybe the answer can be found by looking at my relationship with Bev?
I recall that, many years ago now, the Lord whispered into my heart something that sounded like, "Mike, pay close attention to your relationship with Bev. It is a reflection of our relationship and the dynamics that help or hinder".
So, what is it that puts my relationship with God at risk? They are the same issues that put my marriage to Bev at risk.
There are the very overt and obvious factors. Having an affair comes to mind!! Domestic violence is not going to help the situation, either! Lying about the misuse of money. In fact, deceit of any kind undermines trust. Secret addictions like gambling, drugs or pornography will erode the foundations of the marriage relationship and eventually bring it crashing down.
So it is in the Christian life. Deliberate, continuous sin that goes unchecked by repentance may not terminate my relationship with God (in the sense that I am "lost" or "unsaved") but it will take me to the "distant land" experienced by the prodigal son.
However, there are factors - attitudes and behavior - that are not so overt or obvious which will not necessarily destroy the relationship but will rob it of the intimacy and relational richness that is meant to be experienced by the two partners. These issues have the capacity to desensitize the partners and to do so in such a way that neither party realizes what is happening or, even knowing what is happening, find that they have neither the desire nor the energy to do anything about it. The easy course is to just let things drift.
Lack of quality time together is one factor that many couples would nominate. Too busy to give high priority to being there for each other. That quality time is a gift to each other that says as nothing else can, "You are the most important person in my life. I want to devote time to be with you, to listen to you".
I once asked a Family Law Lawyer what he considered to be the main reason for marriage breakdown. Without having to pause and think about my question, he responded promptly, "Lack of communication".
There is a spiritual parallel here. Quality time with God. There is so much competition and many demands for my time and attention these days. It used to be that TV was the big bogey man. Now we have added to that 'time pirate' other technologies like mobile phones, texting, facebook, twitter, emails - all of these make loud demands for my time. [NB: For all that communication technology, I have a sneaking suspicion that we are communicating less these days!]
Another dynamic in the marriage relationship that can have a subtle but powerful impact is the place and practice of sex. Obviously the changing seasons and passage of time effects the role that sex plays in a relationship. But when it becomes repetitious, predictable (boring?), then a vital expression of love is surrendered and, with it, a loss of intimacy.
Is there a spiritual parallel in this aspect? Yes, I believe there is. I have written about this elsewhere (click here) so I don't want to repeat it here except to note that prayer and sex have some remarkable similarities!!
I know all this stuff. I believe it. I've preached it. But do I do it? All too often I lack the energy to apply myself to these disciplines. These thoughts have emerged out of the initial recognition that, like the Church, I need a fresh revelation of God. I need Him to take the initiative here so that I am freshly energized.
If I try to take the initiative, I am bound to fail. "I must pray more". "I must spend more time with God". At best I will create a couple of new laws to be obeyed. More religious regulations.
But if God would open my eyes afresh to His person and presence in my life….???
